Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
