Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Randomize
