I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
