I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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