So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
