Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
