Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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