Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
