Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
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