i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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