yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
