"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize