I wannas sexs uuuuu
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
