He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
