why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
