Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
