Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
