how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
