Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
