i don't plan on having that self control this summer
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
