tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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