it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
