I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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