Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You can't motorboat a personality
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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