I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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