I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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