I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
