wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
