Is it because I queefed?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize