your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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