we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
