I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
