But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
