3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
