I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
