I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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