yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
