I can text with my tongue
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize