just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
