Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Why is your signature on my underwear?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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