And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I had to cum in my sink.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize