super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
