Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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