do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Sext me about skeletons
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
