HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
