at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
