i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I'm really busy with my period
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