Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
