Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
she was so not down for the gang bang
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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