I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
